Engineering Manager | Trail Runner | Stockholm, Sweden
I was about to hit the bed but before doing that I decided to have a glass of water. I went downstairs to the kitchen then switched off the lights and started ascending the stairs. When I was halfway upwards some eerie light flashed at my feet. I was scared to death before realising that my neighbour switched his car's lamps on and it lit through the smoke-glassed wall of the stairs. Phew.
I just finished watching the Formula 1 Championship's Hungarian Grand Prix which was won by Fernando Alonso. It is weird that he is only 22 years old - born in July 1981 - and already has a first place in a car race that includes the fastest racing cars in the world. On the contrary I am 20 and trying to get my driving license. Well me and those pilots certainly differ in two very important traits. For one they have outstanding stamina and endurance allowing them to drive for two hours while experiencing four g forces pulling them in bends. And secondly they are very level-headed. This does not mean they think or act slow, on the contrary they have extraordinary reflexes but they can also exercise maximum control over themselves which allows them to concentrate during the race and they doesn't let themselves carried away by extreme emotions. This is a feat that is difficult to master for me. I am rather the flaming berserker sometimes. :)
Talking about serenity, this is one thing I like about Luna Lovegood in the fifth Potter book. Even when it was about - temporarily - stealing her posessions she was talking about it to Harry without an exaggerated tone. She is always placid and seemingly it serves her well. I have to admit most of the times people get excited over things - especially negative events - simply doesn't worth it. There are only a few cases when the damage caused is unrepairable and when it is accepting it - though it's hard - is much better then grieving. I don't mean by this that temperament is bad, it is just good for everyone to control it.
Same with driving, when I get angry things usually go for the worse. I think if someone is driving fast led by emotions he is simply reckless on the contrary if he does it with care and self-reliance it is style. :)
Summer with its last breath may want to make us not to forget it easily. Today was the hottest day in a long time and due to the fact that the previous month was much warmer than average this really is something. What more not only was the temperaute iron-melting but also the wind blew fiercely. It was a dry, hot wind, like we were in a desert or something. The evil weather was capped by the fact that many of the plants whose pollen I am allergic to just started blooming. Add this to the wind and you get one of my worst days ever. It is certainly not much fun to lose approximately 20 liters of liquid through your nostrils in 12 hours. I wonder in what shape I will be at 8 PM when I will need to have a driving lesson. If you live in the vicinity do not take a walk at that time! I might sneeze and overlook certain zebra crossings in the process... ;)
I seemed to have taken a months worth of vacation again. It was not entirely intentionally. I cannot say I had no time to update either. I wasn't doing many things during this period, only taking driving lessons (and all the additional stuff like first aid) regularly. It was my unsure mind that prevented me from posting. Familiarising myself with PHP my head swarmed with new ideas how to boost sesam.hu. The main problem was that my current host does not provide PHP support with my webspace. And... I also had new design ideas as a new technology deserves a new look too. I always had the problem to dream about stuff I cannot execute. I am not remotely skilled enough with image editors to do half of the stuff needed to realise half of my design ideas. This results most of the times in one-paged never-published design fragments.
It is about my periodically upcoming destroy-and-rebuild feelings too. All the stuff I did always seems less and less important and worthy as time passes by. I tend to grow tired of my past works, wanting to forget them and never admit I did it because I am ashamed of it. reecently I tend to undervalue anything I do I think. At least there are people who are positively amazed about some things I did unlike me. That is why I decided not to remove anything from this site yet. And I won't redesign sesam.hu either, not now at least.
And - for the thousandth time - I will post...
I wanted to have a shower but unluckily the bathroom was occupied by my brother. You cannot possibly imagine how hot it is here. To make things worse my temples are pounding in blunt, sharp pain. Maybe I have a headache because I've been trying to think too hard today afternoon. I couldn't stop brainstorming what to put on the website I have on my home computer now. Yep, I am thinking about changing SeSam.hu a bit but I haven't yet decided how. Basicly my home computer has a much better environment - I mean PHP and mySQL support here - than the one I have for SeSam.hu. However having a website on my computer would need it to be turned on and online 24/7. This would be hard to accomplish for it is in my bedroom. Sometimes I really need silence around me and I also find it quite unpleasant to sleep with a HDD making noises.
I wish I were already employed by a top ten multi that pays a disgusting amount of money to its employees. I would solve most of my problems pronto. After all I think it would generate new ones anyway.
I was watching What Women Want today. I found it massively entertaining and funny. Basicly the idea that someone who does marketing for a living suddenly gets the ability to read women's mind is a great starting point. And I think both of the main characters are doing a good job to keep the fun going... /I can't help noticing how weak my vocabulary is. There are so many much stronger and more colorful words out there. They just don't come to my mind when I am writing. A shame. If I meet a word I think I can use later I realy should write it down. That would look quite stupid me taking notes while watching TV or reading or paying AO, but... I guess I cannot possibly look more stupid than I am so here we go.../
Yep. Well, be advised: watch that movie on DVD, you will have a good time and you wouldn't need reading my... erm... reviews.. /Jeeeez, no it's not a review, just supposed to be, no... dreamt to be. One day I may be able to write one. Don't let the hope fade, check back later. Lightning can strike. :P/
Long day I had again.
In the morning I tried to play AO. A couple of Velvet members and I went to the Temple of Three Winds and helped an enforcer to get his Stygian Desolator blade. In the meantime I got my hands on some very nice rings. Sadly the link dead problem I experience didn't get any better. I wrote a mail to my ISP again, but my hopes are low that they come up with an actually useful solution.
In the afternoon I continued my PHP learning course I am doing for two days now. I looked up some information on the net and registered at a free webspace provider to be able to write and test PHP codes. Later I decided that I will use my own computer as a testing environment. I made up my mind and installed an {Apache webserver} and the {PHP interperter}. To my great surprise everything went seamlessly. The only problem I had to solve is that WinGate simply blocked all incoming requests on port 80 thinking that it is a malicious trojan horse that attempts to break into my computer. So now I am hosting a test site at {http://rdsl56-004.externet.hu}. I am currently testing but I think there is more to come there later.
However today's hot issue was the {Water Polo World Championship 2003} in Barcelona. The final was played by {Hungary} against Italy. Finally the Hungarian water polo team proved that they *are* the best team in the world and beat Italy 11:9. :D Go, go, Hungary!!
My plan to write an entry earlier wasn't successful. In the morning I played some AO. In the afternoon my cousin and I assembled a list of my movies on CDs. After that a friend of my brother came as well and we all spent the rest of the day outside, cooking on open fire and playing badminton. When I came back I checked up on AO, but it was unplayable. I got disconnected every minute again. Even the support couldn't help. They said the problem lies somewhere on the way my packages take to reach FunCom and this problem cannot be solved only by mailing the ISP and then they forward this to their partners. I have no hope regarding this now.
I tried to automatise my journal as well. I conducted a search on some free weblog sites to see if they are any good. I signed up for an account at {Blogger} but I deleted the whole thing in the end. Firstly personalising the theme - i.e. to make the journal look like the one I have now - seemed really difficult. Secondly I need to find a way to transfer my old posts to the database as well. All this seemed too much of a problem to solve five past one in the evening so I postponed it. I still think the best would be to write a PHP/MySQL motor myself. Which is unlikely because I know nothing about these programs. And I have a hosting subscription that doesn't include these.
I always get to posting late at night. It is half past one now. However the post will show 23th 23:59. I am backdating the posts because they really belong to the previous day not the upcoming. I have already done this with some of them.
I will try to exercise some discipline tomorrow and make myself sit down and write something earlier when I can think faster. As for now, I am off. Sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite! :)
I am too exhausted to think. And I am not good enough yet to write a post without thinking just out of pure imagination. Basicly I had a tiring and very very hot day. Even when I woke up it was so hot as if it had been early afternnon already. I went to the hairdresser and got soaking wet in the seat covered with a vinly cloth. In the afternoon it rained, but it didn't last long and soon it was so hot like nothing interfered. It is hot now even. And I cant sleep well under extreme temperatures.
I watched {Maid in Manhattan} today afternoon. I already read an article about this movie. The writer liked the film though he admitted the story is mainly built up of clichés, the whole movie however has a pleasant atmosphere alltogether.
I liked it as well. It is true {J Lo} is good in this piece. I'd say it was her who starred the film not {Ralph Fiennes}. Basicly it is a modern interpretation of Cinderella. For the first sight it can seem to be a simple romance/comedy, but I think there is more to it. The modern atmosphere makes you believe that such things can happen. The main character - the maid - recognises that it is not the fate that controls her life but she is able to change it, make it better. It emphasises that there are opportunities you can take and decisions you have to make, even if you are not sure about what future holds for you. It sounds pretty USish and I agree that. But I still found Maid in Manhattan is a positive example of the you-can-be-anything-you-want-to-be american idea.
What I liked most was the music. It was always catchy and played a decisive role in creating the atmosphere. The best part was hearing Norah Jones singing two songs. She is just awesome.